Ancient One

Since I am turning 13, old and decrepit, I looked in a Thesaurus to see what other things I will be.

Frail – my beautiful, delicate features are very dainty is what this REALLY means
Aged – I’ll be more mature
Senile – not really sure what this one means
Broken-down – in a little over three years, I’ll own a broken-down Ford
Feeble – I’ll be your typical lovely damsel in distress

These are great things to look forward to. I’m really excited. I just don’t see why adults don’t like describing themselves this way. Who DOESN’T want to be…er…senile, whatever that is? It doesn’t sound that bad. A damsel in distress seems medieval and beautiful. Aged (more mature) is a good thing.

In China’s history, the elderly were shown much respect, for they had wisdom.
In Egypt’s history, it was your duty to address the elderly as "Grandfather", "Grandmother" (even if that person isn’t related to you), or "Ancient One". So now I joke with my mom. Sometimes, when I see her, I say, "Hello, Ancient One."

Now my little siblings must refer to me as "dear, kind, mature, beautiful Ancient One".